Some time in the earlier part of last year, I started watching a series based in England, called “Call the Midwife.”
Two of the show’s characters, one a young nun struggling with feelings of insecurity about her faith, and the other an elderly nun whose age and onset dementia left her feeling no longer needed, were very relatable characters. After all, who hasn’t been insecure or felt unneeded at least once or twice in their lifetime?
It was during a time of reflection and prayer when the younger nun was attacked and viciously beaten as she sat on a bench overlooking a harbor. The attack left her angry and certain that it was because of her inadequate faith that the attack had occurred. Although others had reached out to support her, it was the elderly nun’s caring touch and words of wisdom that helped the younger nun to get through the emotions of anger and hopelessness that seemed to be consuming her.
It was gently and lovingly, that the older nun had taken a warm wash cloth over the arms of the younger nun, touching the many cuts and bruises left by the brutal attack.
“There is a time for us to mortify our flesh” the older nun spoke, “and a time to cherish it and marvel at its strength.” The profound words of someone who’d thought they were no longer needed not only affected that young nun, but me as well.
You could see the effect of those words on the young nun as she sat in silence. Her thoughts of understanding revealed upon her face as later in the episode she would share that revelation.
“I thought at first it was a test of faith,” she spoke, but it was only a test of strength. I can bear more than I ever thought I could and I can bear it for others because my strength is a gift from Him.”
Fighting back tears, I thought of loved ones in my own life who themselves had at times felt unneeded and those who had endured tremendous hardships. I thought of the hardships I myself had experienced and then I thought of Christ on the cross. The anguish He must have felt, wondering if He could possibly bear another second of what He was enduring and crying out to His heavenly father, asking why He’d been forsaken.
What peace Jesus must have felt once He was in his Heavenly Father’s arms and the awe in knowing that He’d made it through, He’d been strong enough to endure.
I too imagine that God smiled knowingly, saying to His son, “I knew you could do it. You are much stronger than you realize and it is your strength Son that will show others they too can endure.”
A pretty awesome thing to realize that life’s trials, things we’ve endured, are the very things that place us in need by others.
So the next time you feel inadequate, remember . . . you are stronger than you think and that strength to endure is a gift from Him, so that you may show others that they too can endure.